Career: I recently finished my first novel and have sent it to an editor and signed with an agent. I’ve outlined most of my upcoming articles for the St Catharines Standard. I have an outline and the first twenty pages started on my next novel and I am almost finished a non-fiction proposal. Despite all this writing I feel – yuck. Nothing. Zip. Uninspired.
Personal: In our personal lives we are still waiting for that special phone call to tell us we are ready to become adoptive parents –again. Each week placements are made in our community but our phone is silent. Boohoo. The temptation is strong to send out invitations to my pity party.
Reality: It’s in times like this that I am glad my faith is not emotion based. It would be really easy to believe that God has forgotten about me, or maybe doesn’t care about these details. But that’s the emotion talking. God’s Word tells me something else.
It tells me that despite how I feel, I’m not alone. Despite feeling neglected, God has not left my side. Despite my struggle to carry this load, God is there – ready to help, waiting to be invited. I don’t have to feel this to believe it because I KNOW it.
God’s word has to be what shapes reality for the believer. If it is not we will be tossed about by childlike theology. God has a plan. His Word tells me so. I might get my book published, I might not. His plan may include a larger family, it may not. But whatever comes my way God will not leave my side.
So, I will count my blessings, not my trials.
I choose to believe even when I’m not feeling it.
I will walk by faith.